It was the day after yesterday, and Jimmy was skiing on clouds. His mother warned him about the thin ones. “Stay away from those cirrus clouds, son. You need to ride the cumulus clouds. They’re much safer.”
Yeah, and boring.
Jimmy tightened the bindings and prepared for his next run.
Sure, Mother knows best about keeping house, and cooking, and putting Band-Aids on boo-boos and stuff. But cloud skiing? Get outta here!
He adjusted his goggles and gave everything a final once-over.
Looks good.
He took a deep breath and pushed off down a slope of silky cirrus clouds, fine as spiderwebs stretched across the sky. The wind whistled in his ears as he gained speed, faster and faster, until it shrieked like a pack of banshees.
“Whooohooo!” he shouted, his voice ringing across the clouds. “Best run ever!” He glided effortlessly on his skis, the sun glinting off the thin wisps trailing behind him.
Too late, he saw the break. The clouds gave way beneath his skis, and he fell through, tumbling head over heels. He reached for the ripcord.
No chute. Uh oh.
He flailed and grabbed at the billowy cumulus clouds all around, but could only manage to tear away a few chunks as he passed.
The ground rushed toward him, spinning wildly, closer and closer, until he could see the blades of grass and weeping willow trees. He braced his body and closed his eyes.
“I’m sorry, Mom. I should have…”
Splat!
Jimmy lay there motionless for what seemed an eternity.
Am I dead?
He patted his body. Alive and in one piece. That’s good.
He opened his eyes. His vision was blurry at first, but as his surroundings came into focus, his blood ran cold. Oh, no, no, no.
This isn’t heaven.
Screams. Writhing shapes. Flames. Hot. As. Hell.
Again.
A burly red devil holding a glowing pitchfork stood nearby, engulfed in flames he seemed to enjoy. He laughed and waggled a crooked finger at Jimmy.
“Welcome back, kid. Like I always say, you should have listened to your mommy. Because Mother knows best.” The devil smirked and crossed himself, smoke curling up from his fingertips.
“But lucky for you, you’ve got a whole eternity to learn your lesson.”
