Habeas Who?

A reporter once asked the president, “Should conditions warrant, would you ever consider suspending habeas corpus?”
“Habeas who?” asked the president.
“Habeas Corpus,” answered the reporter.
The president shrugged. “Well, I don’t know. Habeas Corpus sounds like a Latin name to me. If he’s here illegally from Latin America, then yes, I will consider suspending him.”
The reporter raised his eyebrows. “Mr. President, respectfully sir, I believe habeas corpus is a constitutional right, not a person. However, as president, you may be privy to information I don’t have. Can you elaborate?
The president smirked. “That is a very stupid question, and you are a very stupid reporter. Everyone knows that the word corpus means body in Latin. Habeas is somebody; he’s a person. If he’s here illegally, or he doesn’t have proper papers, then I will suspend him. Which means — for a stupid reporter like you — I will deport him.”
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